Keep Your Face To The Sunshine

As I prepare for yet another surgery, I wanted to reach out to everyone with an update on my current health situation, as well as give a background on my journey through illness thus far. Repeatedly challenged by sickness, I am often left to navigate my way through life around numerous obstacles placed in my way due to complications from Crohn’s disease.

I ask you to read this blog and hopefully you will be able to get a clearer picture of how truly devastating inflammatory bowel diseases such as Crohn’s disease and ulcerative colitis can be. My hope is that once this ordeal is behind me, I can hit the ground running (or at least walking) into 2016. My goal is to get through an entire year without having major surgery or complications. My real hope is that we find the CURE.

Health Challenges Ahead

For the past eight years, I have been struggling with my health. Some of you who follow my page have known about a few of my struggles; others may be new to learning that I have a very severe and complex case of Crohn’s disease. Every doctor I have ever encountered has termed me everything from an “anomaly,” to “complicated,” to “a nightmare.” It has been extremely difficult to walk this journey and try to maintain some normalcy in my life when nothing is “normal” with my health.

When I was 17 years old, I was so sick, and on the cusp of colon cancer, when the doctors decided to remove my entire large intestine and rectum. I underwent a total-proctocolectomy and was given a temporary loop ileostomy and an internal ileo J-pouch.

An ileostomy is when the small intestine is brought through the abdominal wall and waste is diverted to the outside of the body. This continence diversion allows for a person to expel body waste into an ostomy appliance on the outside of the body.

A J-pouch is an internal pouch using a portion of the small intestine made to take the place of the rectum and can be used to expel waste similar to any other person (minus the correct anatomy). My J-pouch was connected to a small part of my anal cuff left behind during surgery and left to heal.

Hospital
Continued Obstacles

I lived with my ileostomy for four months then had it reversed. Physically, I looked “normal” from the outside, other than the abdominal scars I had from surgery. Doctors opened my bottom and the concept was that the J-pouch would emulate a “mock rectum” and function as an internal reservoir for waste out of which I would be able to go to the bathroom somewhat “normally.”  However, I wasn’t so lucky.

In the entire time I had my J-pouch, I went into what essentially would be considered “failure” and was terribly ill for the 20 month duration I had it. My surgeon was trying hard to save the reconstructed organ because he was trying to take my youth into consideration. He was working hard to avoid giving me a permanent ileostomy.

So, I underwent another surgery to go back to a temporary ileostomy in hopes of saving all the reconstructive internal surgery I had done and save my J-pouch. It was not successful.

After 10 months, I underwent testing to see if this extreme procedure would work, but the doctors determined that there was a lack of blood supply flowing to the J-pouch and my disease had attacked everything. There was really no chance to save the tissue and intestine.

The doctors then made the decision that my best case scenario would be to remove the diseased intestine, remove the J-pouch and give me a permanent ileostomy. I was 20 years old.

It Takes a Toll

It is difficult to describe to someone how it feels to constantly have your life interrupted by illness. Although I have incredible family support, it has been a difficult journey to take as I watched my brothers and my friends move on to college when my six attempts at college were detoured by illness, to the point where I just gave up trying. I watched them move out on their own, get married, work a job outside the home, and move forward in life.

For me, it seemed that for each step I took forward this illness tried it’s best to push me two steps backward. I fought back EVERY step of the way. I have tried a myriad of medications, holistic healing, naturopathy, homeopathic, and dietary measures to help myself. If you can think of it, I most likely have tried whatever method to stave off this disease. Up until recently, (as I now am preparing for another surgery and have been taken off of several of my meds in preparation) I was/am taking chemotherapy drugs, biologic drugs, probiotics by the bottle-full, vitamins, dietary supplements, and numerous other medications to sustain my life and existence as best as I can.

Even if from all outward appearance I look “normal,” the crazy thing about this disease is that it is invisible from the outside. I guarantee if you saw me from the inside, you would know how truly devastating this disease really is. I feel that over the years and after numerous surgeries, I have been pieced back together, that all my mismatched parts have been stitched back like an old rag-doll that has seen too many days of wear and tear.

Since my initial series of life changing surgeries, I’ve had to undergo many more as I sacrificed more and more of my intestine to this monster. Last summer, I had another 30 centimeters of intestine removed, and because of a prolapse to my ileostomy, I had my ileostomy moved from my right side to my left side.

Shortly after surgery, I began to experience incredible pain around my new ileostomy. After numerous tests, the doctors found a subcutaneous leak where feces were seeping into my abdomen. Upon further testing, they also found a large abscess at the surgical site in my abdomen. Another major surgery was performed to open me back up. It was so bad; they could not close my abdomen. They left the incision open and I underwent what is known as “healing by secondary intention.” I was put on a woundVAC machine, and my wounds were packed and treated until they healed. I spent more than a month hospitalized and another six weeks with home healthcare nurses taking care of me with the additional help of my parents.

The Journey Continues

Fast forward to this year, and I still have not had much luck conquering this disease. I have yet to get through a year without major surgery or to even have lengthy respite from being in the hospital. Even this year I have been hospitalized five times since January 2015.

Earlier this fall, I started to experience incredible pain in my lower abdomen. Several days had passed, and the pain increased. I had been home alone caring for my nephew when I knew there was a bigger issue than just typical Crohn’s pain. I called my parents, who were out in New York visiting my brother. My parents cut their trip short, left NY, and raced back home.

Upon arrival my mom rushed me to the ER. I was immediately admitted inpatient with an abscess. The problem was that the abscess had formed in my lower abdomen where my anal cuff had been left behind from my permanent ileostomy surgery, and they sewed up my bottom. The mucosa produced from the tissue, along with bacteria, had caused a critical situation, making conditions ready for this disaster to happen. The abscess was located in a very vascular area and was affecting other organs.

The decision was made to transport me to another hospital more equipped to handle the level of care I needed. I was taken by ambulance, and by the time I arrived at the other hospital I had gone septic. I ended up in the ICU for several days and had to undergo emergency surgery to place drainage pumps to get the infection from my abdomen out. It was a terrible ordeal, and it is remarkable that I even recovered from being that sick.

After a week in the hospital, I was discharged with the pump, drains, and tubes still inside of me. As long as my mom could care for my apparatus at home, I could continue treatment from home. So I went, happy as a clam to get out of the place I so ungraciously refer to as “The Joint.”

However, this doesn’t end here. This is the reason for the inspiration for this blog post. I had the drainage system in a little over two weeks until the doctors were able to remove them. Unfortunately, this could be a reoccurring problem, and they said I may not survive another episode if the abscesses come back. In order to prevent that from happening, I need to have the entire area removed. This will entail the complete removal of the anal area, the muscle surrounding it, the internal area where the disease is showing, and any of the area where abscesses may form.

At this time, there is no way to know how deep it will be or how much will need to be taken out. The best case scenario would be about a three inch diameter section of my bottom, but internally I am not sure. Needless to say, I am extraordinarily frightened.

Actually, that doesn’t even come close to explaining how I feel as this disease continues to ravage my 25-year-old body and continues to claim one piece at a time. From diseased intestines, surgeries, hospitalizations, blood clots, infusions, transfusions, PICC lines, infections, and a number of other challenges, this disease has truly tested every bit of physical and mental strength I possess and it continues to do so. Fear does not own me, but I can honestly say it is ever present through this journey.

I was told the recovery time is six to eight weeks for this type of surgery. Each one of these surgeries makes my situation even graver and more challenging for an already challenged body. There are moments when I feel like screaming out in rage and beg for an answer to the question “WHY?” Other times, I feel like I just want to embrace life and celebrate EVERY. SINGLE. MOMENT. that I can. I choose the latter most often.

Hospital

You Give Me Strength and Purpose

My surgery is scheduled for December 9th, 2015. I was able to obtain medical clearance from my doctors to travel to New York City for a few days before surgery to visit my brother, and I am really looking forward to that trip. I feel like having that to look forward will help keep my mind off the obvious event of surgery looming in front of me. Each moment to add good memories to my life canvas makes all the difference in the world! I am so eternally grateful for the many gifts in my life. I owe all to Allah, my family, Nate, my friends, my IBD family (Crohn’s and colitis patients and doctors), and you, my crochet family who keep me fighting when I feel weak.

I have shared with you before how much I value crochet. I have told you how crochet saved me, but you may not know what you have done for me every day that you showed up to watch my videos and work on my projects. You gave me purpose in an otherwise difficult time when I wasn’t sure of my value. You gave me reason to keep working, creating, and teaching. That is more valuable to me than all the medicine in the world. When I say, “I wish I could hug each and every one of you,” I truly mean it. Thank you so much for the contribution YOU have made to my life. Sometimes people say that I have impacted their life, well; it goes both ways. You have truly impacted so much of my life.

I will be taking time off from filming, but have managed to film a few nice videos ahead of time, to be released during my surgery and recovery. I hope to make a full recovery and get back to crochet and creating in no time! Please continue to share your work. I promise to keep checking back to see what progress everyone has made. As soon as I am able, I will be back, ready to hook my way into action!

Thank you for your patience and your continued support. There are no words that can express my honest gratitude.

“Keep your face to the sunshine and you will not see the shadows.” ~Helen Keller

Love and *Soft Yarn Hugs,*

Your crochet instructor,
Nadia Fuad

If you would like to learn more about Crohn’s disease and ulcerative colitis, please visit the Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation of America’s website at www.ccfa.org

134 responses

  1. I read you story. Brought tears to my eyes. I too have been plagued with illness most of my life. I will pray for you and keep you in my thoughts I have crocheted all my life but here lately it too has saved me. It helps to have something to share and to keep yourself busy when you are sick. I have enjoyed all your videos. Thank you so much for making those. Thank you again and I pray God keeps you in his loving arms. Linda McNary

  2. Nadia, you’re story is just so awful! I cannot imagine going through all your pain. I too am a crocheter. I only found you on youtube probably a couple of months ago and you sound so healthy and cheerful. I am truly inspired by your tutorials. I recently made the turkey hat. Nadia, I will be praying for you. Your journey has touched my soul to the core. I hope you get a healing miracle. I will be asking God. I believe feeling your emotions and releasing them would help to heal your body and your soul. God bless you, or in your case, may Allah bless you. Brenda

  3. Hi Nadia,
    I just subscribed to your YouTube channel after making the mermaid afghan. If it wasn’t for your video, I would never had been able to do it!
    I have just read your story for the first time and cried. I can’t imagine how you can remain so positive – God bless you and please know how much I appreciate both your crochet teachings, but ever more so your courage.
    Hugs to you!!!

  4. I wish you only the best. My prayers and thoughts are with you. Good luck and may God bless you now and always. Debbie

  5. Hi Nadia, i’m so touched by your story…It shows your purpose in life- to give INSPIRATION, HOPE, LOVE, HAPPINESS, FAITH AND EVRYTHING THAT LIFE HAS TO OFFER..It is a hard ordeal since you are the one in that situation, It is hard to keep on smiling in the face of all the pain and struggles, but yes, i know, it is the better way to face life than to just let it pass without letting people know that you are here…I am assurring you now that you have given evrybody who read this and viewed your videos their own purpose in life and that in itself can never be taken away from you…YOU ARE SUCH A GOOD SOUL, YOU ARE SERVING YOUR PURPOSE IN THIS LIFE !!! I ENVY YOUR GUTS, YOUR POWER, YOUR FAITH, YOUR HOPE…NOT A LOT OF US HAVE THAT!!! GOD LOVES YOU SO MUCH AND YES, PLEASE FEEL THAT ITH EVERY BREATH THAT YOU TAKE….I’ll be praying for you and your family, enjoy your coming trip, that is a bonus from GOD, making you feel HIS LOVE….
    Been where you are now with my hubby who has now celebrated his 5th bday in heaven and it was i who shared to our friends what you just shared here – he had diabetec complications from his dialysis as well , buergers disease, 13 amputations of all sorts in his last 2 yrs with us…but he never forgot to smile even in pain, and that alone gave inspiration to all the people around us and shamed those giving up hope in their little trials in life….
    So, carry on my love, you are doing great just being yourself..
    YOU ARE OUR BLESSING!!!YOU ARE SHOWING THE VALUE OF LIFE AND YES, YOU ARE GODS’ CHILD !!!! BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY!!!!!

  6. Nadia, I did not know your history with the disease but while reading it now, it pains my heart that you have to suffer like this. I will keep you in my prayers and I absolutely LOVE your courage. I discovered your videos on youtube a few weeks ago and have become hooked. I did know how to crochet but by no means am I a pro but using your tutorials I am getting better.

  7. I’m sorry that you have to go through all this but I hope that you get well fast. I am a big fan of yours as you are very creative and talented with your crochet. You have more things to create so get well soon.

  8. Nadia, I will keep you in my prayers. You are an amazing person. I thank you so much for sharing your incredible talent, and now for sharing your incredibly painful journey. May the future bring you peace and health and prosperity. Stay strong and positive.

    I also crochet to keep the pain away. Emotional and physical. Many, many warm soft yarn hugs for you. <3 <3 <3

    Martha

  9. Nadia, you are such a warrior, a true inspiration. I am truly sorry for what has happened in the journey of your life. Crohn’s disease is awful for those of us who have it, and for those who love us. Much love to you. I will be thinking of you & praying for the best possible outcome.~~ Nova

  10. Nadia, I will have you in my prayers. I am so truly sorry that you have had to go through this most painful journey. I thank you so much for sharing your talent and now for sharing your incredibly frustrating and terrifying ordeal. Stay strong and stay positive.

    May the future bring you peace, health and prosperity. I know you have lots and lots of love from your family as well as your followers.

    I am also a crocheter and I look to it as an escape from emotional as well as physical pain. Thank goodness for beautiful yarn. 😀 I send you tons and tons of warm, soft yarn hugs. <3 <3 <3

    Martha

  11. I had no idea you were ill and so sorry all you have and will go thru. You will be in my prayers. I love the way you teach and the hooded cardigan was a hit. I’ve made 5 of them. One for me, one for each of my three daughters and another for my daughters mother in law. When I wear mine I get so many compliments. I also made a shawl you taught and shared many patterns from that. You hold on girl.

    Sent from connie black

    >

  12. You are such a brave girl! Some of us have more understanding than can be expressed. My best friend of 30 years (since we were 13 years old) is fighting the same body snatching monster you are. Chron’s disease is devastating to say the least. I have seen what it can do first hand.
    I too am fighting invisible illnesses, a genetic connective disorder, Ehlers-Danlos syndrome. I also have a large aortic root aneurysm, a cancer survivor, and several other maladies.
    What I really want to say to you is thank you for your videos and tutorials. I feel that crochet has added to my life and pulled me out of dark thoughts and feelings. It has given me a desire to create and learn, motivated me to think about more than just problems, pill schedules, and pain. A reason to turn my face toward the sunshine. I lost both of my grandmothers early in my life and never had the chance for them to teach me. I am a visual learner and because of your videos, I can continue to build on a skill that I never thought I would be able to learn.
    Again thank you for sharing your knowledge, skills, and videos. They are appreciated and very useful. I wish you all the best. You have given us “students” a gift. I hope you receive a gift of healthier days. Take care and be good to yourself.

  13. You are a very strong beautiful women. I admire your strength and courage. I will pray for you don’t loose your faith dear instructor you have taught me much and will continue to do so . I will pray for you everyday day .the LORD is with you. Will be waiting for your come bakes PRAYERS

  14. God’s blessings on your upcoming surgery and a speedy recovery. I hope all goes well and this will be an end to all of it. I have a sister with crohn’s but not with all the problems you have had. She did get Colin cancer and beat it. I have IBS and life is sometimes not easy for us either. God be with you and give you strength.

  15. Nadia, I also found your website just a few months ago. I can understand some of the pain you feel with this horrible illness as I too have Crohns. I haven’t had to go through nearly as much as you have, but can totally understand how trying to describe the pain and other issues to friends and family feels, especially when you look fine on the outside. I pray that God will give you relief after this next surgery. I love your videos and your energy is so positive. I always look forward to what you will create next. Take care and I wish you peace and happiness through this holiday season.

  16. Dear Nadia your strength and positive outlook is truly inspirational. I have been a nurse for almost 40 years and to hear someone so young and who has gone through so much continuing to guide others is nothing short of amazing. I will be sending positive thoughts and yarn hugs to you December 9 and everyday till you return to us. God bless you

  17. Dear Nadia, God bless you as you endure this new trial. Although I endure pain and illness on a daily basis I cannot imagine how difficult these operations must be to go through. Love and prayers are with you and your family and the hope that you will soon be back to enjoying your crochet as much as we enjoy seeing your wonderful and original videos. Ceit

  18. Nadia, i will continue to say prayers for you and ask God to heal you completely! <3 i am truly sorry for all that you have gone thru, but your courage and strength is amazing! i too have many health issues that i have dealt with or dealing with since my early years as well, and the depression is most often worse than the diseases/aliments/syndromes themselves. i found you on youtube when almost a year ago i started to learn how to crochet and you were wonderful, clear, concise and very creative! i am very grateful to you, and i so appreciate all of you teach and share your talent with us. we 'crafters' for the most part are the most giving, caring, and unselfish people on this planet!!
    i wish you well and a speedy recovery and ask God to have grace and mercy on you. 🙂 i hope you do keep in touch when you can with updates for us. God bless you kiddo!
    (i wanted to also say, the last time you were in the hospital before halloween time, i had a dream/vision with you in it. you had designed a new hat, kinda like a butterfly. i was right there with you watching it come together!! (this does happen to me from time to time, but usually with someone i really know…) because of my severe depression, i 'checked' out of socializing again and was kicking myself in the butt for not sharing with you this beautiful design. i am truly sorry for not sharing this with you sooner. i promise if it ever happens again, i WILL contact you!! (and no i am not crazy, lol, just sometimes very connected!)
    again, God bless you, prayers, and love and hugs to you and may the angels surround you that you can feel their presence and wrap you in their wings of love and protection and give you comfort (And hugs!!) <3 🙂
    cindy

  19. You will have healing thoughts coming to you from MA. I wish you an uneventful recovery. Focus on yourself, we will all be patiently waiting for your return.

  20. Dear Nadia: I don’t know you personally, but I have come to know you through your tutorial videos. I don’t like to post up anything on Facebook, but I also have benefited from your lessons and I am tremendously grateful to you. Your relating the physical ordeals you have gone through has touched me deeply. You are a brave and resilient girl! May God keep you in his embrace and give you the strength to face another challenge. I will certainly be praying for you as you get ready to face this coming surgery in December. May God bless you abundantly!

  21. Dear Nadia: I will be praying for you everyday. I have made a few projects using your videos on youtube. Right now I started the gentilmen’s scarf, actually I’m making 4. I was thinking about also making 2 infinity scarves using this pattern to make a matching set for the one I making for my nephew for his girlfriend. And one for my niece to match the one I’m making for her fiancé. Did I get the right order? Anyway I hope you get the picture. I’ll send you a picture when I finish, hopefully for Christmas. And I wish you health coming out of this latest challenge you ‘ll be going through. The last time (September) you went in the hospital I went and joined a singing Rosary at church as I was walking in I looked down to the ground and found a tiny pink Rosary I picked it up and took it home, and every time I look at it I think of you. If you’d like I’ll send you a picture of it next to mine so you can see how dainty it is. My prayers are always with you.

  22. Nadia, wishing you sunshine and blue skies…may God hold you in his loving arms and carry you thru this medical journey, let the sun light your days and the stars brighten your nights…sending you all my love and prayers! <3 Big HUGS <3

  23. I pray you find comfort in knowing how much you inspire others with your crochet videos, your courageous fight for health and your positive outlook on life. Thank you for sharing it all with us.

  24. I read your story and am touched and worried for at the same time. I pray you get better and make it through this surgery. I shared your story and asked for others support for you too. I enjoy all your crochet items. Take care

  25. Nadia, I pray that God blesses your surgeons hands, and your recovery. You continue to be an inspiration to me and although I’ve been crocheting for 26 years, you have taught me many new things which I want to thank you for. I’ll be keeping you and your family in my prayers. Enjoy your visit with your brother! Thank you again 😇

  26. Thank you so much for sharing Nadia. You have helped me cope with a nasty divorce & the loss of my son. Making the hats I do makes me happy. It makes me happier when I share them with others. Bless you & your upcoming surgery. I pray it will be a success!

  27. Nadia, I have been following your posts and have been hoping for your recovery. I’m so sorry to hear that you face yet more challenges. I wish you well and healing.

    I have had the good fortune to be in remission from ulcerative colitus for which i am very grateful. I have often wondered if, at any point, you tried low dose naltrexone (LDN) as a possible source of relief? It was the source of my deliverance. I fully understand that it is not always effective. I ask for your forgiveness if my question offends you.

  28. Nadia, your story is harrowing but your attitude is lovely in spite of all you’ve been through. I spent two years in chemo for Non-Hodgkins lymphoma – I can understand only just a very little of what you’ve been through. I owe my total healing to Jesus Christ…

    I really just want to thank you for your videos – They’re so great 🙂 I just completed the mermaid afghan yesterday and I started the shark blanket today: Since I have such a hard time reading patterns, I can say for sure that I could not have made them without you. You’re a fabulous and generous teacher.
    God bless you, Nadia 🙂 I’ll be praying for you!
    Regards in Christ ♡

  29. I cried through this, reading about your ordeal! So terribly unfair. Words fail me. Your courage is humbling. You truly embody the characteristics of a fierce warrior woman. Keep looking to the light! Holding you in my thoughts, wishing you strength and rapid healing. Much love, Jen from Cape Town, South Africa.

  30. Nadia I’ll be praying for you, thank you for sharing something so private with us , I just recently found your turtorial I’m so grateful, I admire you, you are so brave and strong, God bless you, I’ll keep you in my prAyers🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻

  31. My thoughts are with you. When my father was in his 20’s (in the early 1950’s) he too had an ileostomy for ulcerative colitis. It was a very rocky road in the early years but except for bouts here and there, he lived a full life into his 70’s when he died of an unrelated problem.

  32. Thank you for sharing your story… i started crocheting about a year ago and have learned so much from you! My thoughts and prayers are with you.

  33. You are so strong, I admire your courage, I pray for your recovery and wish all your suffering will be over forever, God bless you❤️

  34. It kills me every time I read these posts/blogs. I’m so sorry that IBD has set up shop within you Nadia💜. Aiden and I hope to one day meet you so that we can give a big hug and show you how much we admire your strength and courage. We will never stop fighting for a CURE. All of our love, Robynn & Aiden✊🏼

  35. Nadia, I needed a Minion hat for my nephew and came across your video. You make it so easy to follow. I’m new at crocheting and my hat is at the eye instruction. I’m going to try and make two adult sizes in the near future. I wish you a speedy recovery and the best New Year for 2016 that God can send you.

  36. Nadia, Thank you for sharing your Crohn’s disease journey and your crochet videos. I also have an auto-immune disease that affects my daily life and caused me to have 3 surgeries on my hip, the last being a total hip replacement. I love watching your videos and crocheting along with you – crocheting is very therapeutic for me. Best wishes for relief from your auto-immune disease.

  37. Nadia, I am so glad that I found you. You have touched and affected so many hearts!! Your video tutorial on the mermaid has been such an inspiration, I can hear and feel the strength in your voice you have for life and how crocheting has helped you physically and emotionally; and I thank you for sharing this with us. I look forward to your updates on your health and projects!! Prayers and hugs for you in 2016 !!!!

  38. Hi Nadia,
    I just subscribed to your YouTube channel after making the beautiful red and white baby dress and if it wasn’t for your video, I would never had been able to do it!
    I have just read your story for the first time and couldn’t stop my tears as I myself have been through a lot. Thirteen years ago we lost our 22 year old son and seven years I was diagnosed with breast cancer – it has been a very tough journey but my husband and I have come out of it and I am sure you will too.
    Please be positive and may the Lord shower his blessings on you for a speedy recovery and all the best for 2016.
    Despite all the difficulties you face, I really appreciate all the effort and dedication you are putting into your tutorials and admire you for all your courage and strength.
    May God Bless You.

  39. Hi Nadia I found your page after making the Mermaid Afghan for my Niece for college I making one for m1 Year old Granddaughter and a Shark Blanket for my 4 year old Grandson who can’t wait until it’s done he made me the body to make the tail and he keeps telling me to make the teeth now lol I to have a eleostimy mine due rectal cancer but im cancer free now I look forward the new square everyday. I hope your doing fine now and more health problems. HAPPY HOOKING

  40. Hi Hun! (Bear with me, I am old and call everyone Hun), Hope you are on the mend. I do have to tell you that I am getting back into crochet after a 50 some year absence and your tutorials are the BEST! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

    Hang in there sweetie! Know that we are all sending you lots and lots of warm, soft hugs, prayers and positive thoughts.

    I could not have done a square (plain) beanie without you! I used your Sponge Bob tutorial for a square beanie that I can put pom poms in the two corners for a baby. Your explanations got me through turning the rows, etc. Love the video on the foundation chains as well. Use that all the time too. Hey, no magic circle????

    I am off to find some of that stained glass yarn you use for the slouchy hat. Fabulous! I am crocheting for upcoming babies in my family, for babies at work plus I think the women undergoing cancer treatments at the hospital I give hats to, would love it! Thank you again. Big, big hugs your way!

  41. God bless you Nadia. You are such a gifted and beautiful person, I hope this is the end of the illness and onward and upward for you in 2016. Best wishes, and many hugs to you. I’ll be sending good thoughts your way.

  42. While reading your story I was so inspired by the courage and determination you have. You have embraced a illness at such a young age and is so grateful and thankful such to see another day.
    You have shown me in spite of what we have to go through in life that GOD will be there for us. I
    pray that you continue to stay positive may you be blessed through your inspiring story and crafts. May you continue to be a inspiration to others who are dealing with this disease. I have had to deal with some illness myself but mines were the size of a mustard seed compared to the mountain you have been climbing.

    JHarper

  43. Nadia your story is so heart breaking and yet encouraging as well. After all you’ve been through you have a wonderful attitude and from your videos I can tell you have a soft and gentle spirit. I just learned of the 365 days of granny squares last week and joined the bandwagon. I’ve been working on 2 a day until I can get caught up and I just completed #10. I am enjoying this crochet along so much and want to thank you and your dad for your commitment to doing this. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family as you continue your battle with such an unforgiving illness. It does my heart good to see that you won’t let it get you down, and you keep on keeping on with your passion for crochet.

  44. Nadia,
    I have watched the steady deterioration of my brother from this disease. My thoughts and prayers are with you and I hope all went well with your surgery. Crochet has been a solace to me in times of distress and I have been doing this for at least 50 yrs. Blessings on you, child, and may you be healed.

  45. Hi Nadia, I HOPE You are feeling better. I’m so happy I found your tuturials and Yanuyopia. I made the mermaid blanket and am now working on the shark blanket. I can’t wait to start my football head warmer with N.E. Patriots colors !! LOL.. I do love Green Bay Packers, too though, blieve it or no!. Thank yu so much, I learned so many diddferent crochet stitch just from these 2 projects. I can’t wait to see what you’ll have on Yarnutopia for spring and summer! Thank you,

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