Life is Changing

Life is Changing

It’s been quite a while since I have last written an update both regarding my health and also Nasir’s diagnosis of autism. As far as my health goes, I feel I’m in the best place I have been in years. I have occasional setbacks, but over-all I have been feeling very good. I’ve been following up with doctors, continuing my biologic medication, and trying to practice a healthier lifestyle. I have been going to the fitness center several days a week. The gym is two-fold. One, for my physical and mental health, and secondly for Nasir. He is socializing with his peers more and more, and the gym’s childcare services provide an opportunity for him to do just that.

Where we started

Since I last blogged about this, we were in the middle of a whirlwind of overwhelming hits coming at us from every direction. Nas wasn’t meeting his appropriate age mile markers. I was battling my own health issues with my Crohn’s disease and mental health, the most difficult being post-partum depression and anxiety. You can read more here.

Soon after the doctors told us Nasir was on the Autism Spectrum, we were thrust into a new normal of therapies of all kinds. Speech, behavioral, occupational, and more. Nasir was nearly two years old and other than making some babble sounds, he didn’t say actual words, mimic our sounds, answer or respond to his name, he wouldn’t make eye contact often, he played independently from other children (other kids didn’t interest him much), he obsessively watched or paid attention to only certain things like specific TV shows that he watched over and over. We would discount or rationalize them, or chalk it up to other things – “maybe it’s his hearing” or “he was born a little early, he’s just a little delayed.”

What came next

Getting the diagnosis of ASD was bittersweet for our family. It’s one of the most overwhelming things to process, but we also have a solid reason for the why’s we were experiencing. We could finally move forward with all the wonderful resources our community has to offer.

Where we are now

Nasir is in therapy nearly every day. He is now talking non-stop. He has lots to talk about and share. He has big opinions and now that he has discovered his voice, he is eager to discover new words, things and experiences. He loves adventure, to play, and to build. He swims and loves the park. He has friends and learns a lot from parallel play. He recently started dancing and his love of music has always been strong. Magna-tiles have opened up his imagination, and he is a master at building castles. He sings, counts, says the alphabet, and identifies so many objects we see throughout the day. He loves his family. Mama and Daddy are his favorite people followed by his grandparents, all his aunties, uncles, cousins and his amazing therapists. He loves reading books, and presently, The Mickey Mouse Clubhouse is his favorite TV show. (We shout “OH TOODLES” a dozen times a day!)

We have come SO FAR in a just under a year. The therapies have provided Nate and I small windows in our day to have a break. Despite Nasir’s achievements, he is still demonstrating behavior that do not allow us many moments for breaks. He’s still a wild toddler, of course, but he also never sits still, his attention span is very short. We are having less meltdowns, but they still occur daily. My entire life is devoted to this sweet boy and facing all the challenges that come our way.

Moving ahead

When I do get a chance, I’m trying to get back into my crochet. I feel that spark coming back. I feel several sparks returning. I’m beginning to feel more like myself. Therapy has helped – my own therapy. It’s been life-changing. Little by little, I have been able to piece myself back together. I’m stronger than I have been in a long time. I can do hard things, and I’m doing them every day. If Nas is doing hard things, then I need to continue to set an example and do the same. We continue to take baby steps toward doing more crochet projects and hopefully soon, things will be back into full-swing.

I am currently working on one crochet project per month, and I have a goal of doing 3 to 4 projects per month like I used to do. At the time of creating this blog post, I am anticipating planning out our Halloween costumes for the family this year. You know we have to go all out like every year! Can’t wait to share what we have up our sleeve in 2022!

 

Here are some fun pictures we took this summer!

 

 

 

 

Thank You

Thank You

I want to say a huge thank you to everyone who took the time to read my latest blog post regarding my absence from YARNutopia lately and the next chapter we are heading into with our son Nasir. I have been overwhelmed with so many emotions from the outpouring of love and supportive kind words you left on my posts, in my messages, and the texts I received all day.

There is no way for me to individually reply to all of you, but just know I read every word and took it all to heart. I appreciate all the openness you shared from your personal experiences with friends, family members, or even first-hand experiences with Autism Spectrum Disorder. I am currently educating myself on all the different types of therapies and discussing with the specialists what they advise in helping Nasir progress. We hope to see some changes in the first month of this new therapy. We are extremely hopeful.

Reading all the comments and messages that flooded in gave me so much encouragement and hope for my little guy. I know he will accomplish great things in his life, and luckily, we can be his advocates for his success.

In the meantime, please continue to support YARNutopia by sharing my patterns, watching my videos on YouTube, visiting my blog, and purchasing the Wood Be Fancy Crochet Hooks. That helps tremendously during this transition!

From the bottom of my heart, thank you all,

Nadia

 

Where’s Nadia?

Where’s Nadia?

Lately, I have been receiving quite a few inquiries asking for new crochet video tutorials. So many of you have been kind and thoughtful to reach out to ask if everything is ok simply because I haven’t posted videos or new content for a while. A lot has been happening and many of the recent events have made it difficult to find time to post or film.

We are halfway through a rough year.

Covid quarantine had already hindered my video production because it was difficult to film, travel, get together with my parents to help with my posts. During this time, Nate and I noticed Nas was not meeting his baby/toddler milestones. We chalked it up to being so isolated from other kids and lack of activities because who has any data about raising babies during a pandemic? Naturally, we didn’t want to think there was anything amiss, but over time we noticed Nasir was falling further and further behind on meeting these markers. He wasn’t responding to his name when called, he was transfixed on specific shows, his attention span was non-existent, he had no fear of danger, he wouldn’t parallel play, didn’t listen, didn’t make eye contact, began hitting aggressively because he was unable to communicate only a few words, he had very little verbal skills and much of what he gained would be lost after one or two days. Yet, here he is so silly, adventurous, funny, smart and just being our cute little Nasir in so many other remarkable ways, we didn’t know if these things we were observing were ok or should we be concerned? He is our first child, so we had no way to fully know.

One or two of these things would be no cause for alarm, but we started adding up more and more then questioning more and more until we couldn’t deny the fact that we might be dealing with something more than just the lack of socialization because of the stay at home order.

Tests, Tests, and more Tests

We took Nas to doctor after doctor, therapist after therapist and to make a long story short, the doctors and specialists have told us he is on the Autism Spectrum. In some of his abilities, he is excelling and is testing in a much higher percentile. In other ways, he is testing quite low. He is struggling with language the most which he is currently testing at an 8-9 month level. He is almost 26 months old at the time I’m posting this. Nate and I felt heartbroken at first, but not for long. We put ourselves into 5th gear and did all the things within our power to make things easier for Nas.

 

Our lives are turned upside down

We have speech therapy and occupational therapy in home (Finally! It was virtual for the first few months because of Covid) The therapists we have in-home were instrumental in pointing us in the right direction to get Nasir the help and support he needs. We were recently approved for even more early intervention programs which we have learned are extraordinary in what they are able to do to help Nas. We are hopeful and optimistic. Although we have to wait a short bit to enroll him for those programs, there is a beginning in sight!

Oh my heart…

Nasir is our whole world. His struggles and his energy have kept our hands and hearts full. There has been little to no time to do more than take care of him, keep up with his never-ending energy, and get him the best resources we can to help him navigate this challenging path. Our entire life has been devoted to his care and to the success he can achieve by this early intervention. I know that this is a process and I have to trust the process, but I am not going to lie, I have cried a million tears, I have filled out thousands of pages of paperwork, I have made a hundred phone calls and some days it still doesn’t feel like enough. I have some serious mom guilt. I can’t even describe it. We are tired, worn out, frustrated at times, hard on ourselves, you name it, we have felt it. I don’t leave the house for days because it’s just too much. We go to my parents’ house for a break from time to time because they are such a big help for us when we are exhausted.

This has tested us as parents, it has tested us as a husband and wife. But at the end of the day, we have this incredibly sweet boy who needs us SO much. Our hearts explode with the love and need to keep him safe and happy and do whatever we can to get him to reach all of his potential. One day, we are hopeful that we may hear him say Mama and Dada..

One day at a time

I haven’t forgotten about my YARNutopian family. Quite the contrary – in fact, I actually feel so anxious to get back to my crochet, but I simply have to sacrifice something in order to manage life right now. I am still working, but very minimally. I still check in every day and post older links to some fun patterns I’ve shared in the past. I have great expectations in the mornings, but by mid-day I am wiped out by the challenges we have in our home at the moment. This is hard.

I am currently working on a new crochet project. It’s going at a snail’s pace, but it is going. I am trying to navigate this new chapter of our lives while giving myself some grace to be ok with the status quo. When the time comes, Nasir will have some one-on-one time with specialists who will provide what he needs to help him talk and reach his goals, then I will have a few hours each day of respite to get back to crochet. In the meantime, I appreciate your patience, support, and understanding as we keep moving forward. Please continue to watch my videos, visit my blog, and support my pages. I promise, I will be back.

With love and hugs,
Nadia